Advice from Real Moms

"If I may offer some advice"...

Here you'll find words of wisdom from real-live Mamas!

To submit your words of wisdom, please use our Contact Form.



"Have something that is just yours and only yours, yep be selfish, I have a chapstick in my purse that no one else is allowed to drool on, chew up or leave for me to find in their pocket in the dryer. It's all mine and it feels so good after a whole day of sharing everything from my lap to my bathroom time to my dinner to have something that is still mine."
Jamie



"As a mother of four little girls, I think I have a little wisdom I could share with a new mom. With my first baby, I really wish someone had just told me to RELAX (in a gentle way, of course). When she was born, it was seriously my goal to be perfect. I played Mozart to her in utero. By the time she was a couple of months old, I read to her for at least an hour a day. She was on a perfect schedule. I boiled everything she touched until she was 8 months old. During her naps, I would clean like crazy and actually spray Lysol all over the floor and furniture. I realized what a departure I had made one day as I was holding my newborn fourth baby and looked over to see my 18 month old laying on the kitchen floor licking up some dried grape juice her older sister had spilled. Now I know that I can't be perfect. I mess up all the time! But I find rest in the fact that God gave me these kids, He will give me what I need to take care of them. They know they are loved to pieces. And now they know they have a mom that's relaxed enough to be super silly and dust off the cracker that just hit the floor. They know they can trust me with anything, because I can't stop loving them and I can't disappointed enough by anything they tell me that I won't be proud of who they are."
Ginger in Arizona



Breastfeeding: Less Work, More Sleep
"I know all the jazz about breast being best for baby but it's best for mama too! Disregarding all that medical stuff, breast feeding is perfect for the over tired, over worked mom. Think about it. Do you think you'll remember to bring the PERFECT amount of food every time you go out? Or that your child will patiently wait while you make a bottle while everyone in your favorite restaurant stares at you? Plus there isn't any risk of burning yourself in the middle of the night when the baby wakes you up for the millionth time screaming in hunger. All you have to do is lift your shirt up and go back to sleep. There's no better comfort when the baby hurts him or herself, is teething, is sick, etc. All you have to do is be there. Yeah, nursing bras are generally pretty ugly, sometimes you'll feel like a milk cow and you'll probably never look at your boobs the same again but IT'S WORTH IT!"
Brandi in California



"Relax! Enjoy the time you have when they are tiny, little and becoming big kids because when it's over, you'll realize it went too fast and all the things they did that drove you nuts were ok.

While it would be amazing if we could all have all the money we would ever need, most of us don't. Don't stress about what you don't have. You have enough to love your child and care for them, even if the budget is tight more often than it's not.

You probably don't need all that stuff you registered for anyway. And it just takes up tons of space that could be better used for other things.

Nurse as long as possible. You'll miss that time when it's done.

Co-sleeping= more sleep.

Vacuum when baby is sleeping. That way you don't have to tip toe around the house in order for baby to sleep.

Buy at least one baby carrier. It'll be the best purchase you ever made.

If someone offers to help you, accept the help. If they didn't mean it, they shouldn't have said it. ;) And none of us did it all without help."
Brandi in California



"My baby recently turned 4 months old. From one new mom to another...

* You are more capable than you think! Trust that your heart will tell you what to do.
* Speak up when it feels like someone is stepping on your toes, stepping between you and your baby, or overstaying their welcome. As a new mom, you have every right to call the shots. It's important that you do!
* Resist the temptation to break seals or remove tags from every new item right away -- you might be surprised by how much you won't or can't end up using after all.
* That funny/cute/amazing thing the baby does this week may not be around next week -- pull out the camera and record it TODAY.
* Yes, eventually you WILL feel normal "down there" again.
* No, you are not alone.
* Double your recipe whenever you cook and freeze half to consume another day -- double the meals, but not double the work, yay!
* One mom's "must have" is another mom's "can do without!"
* Keep your standards and expectations in check -- you might be amazed by how happy you can be with less.
* Keep bottles of water around the house and commit to drinking at least half of one every time you change a diaper, feed the baby, etc."
Leah in New York



"If I may offer some advice...
take the advice you receive with a grain of salt. Everybody has their own opinions and a lot of people feel that their opinion is right for you even if it may not be."
Tracey



"To a New Mom:

Your child is only going to get bigger and better from this point on. So hang in there and things will be easier soon."
Suchika



"When people offer to help…TAKE THEM UP ON IT!"
Lynn Anne in New Jersey



"im a stay at home mother of 4, for all new mothers i have known--i tel lthem one thing, there is NOTHING in the world that can get you prepared for motherhood, no book, no doctor, nothing--it may give you a heads up on what you may experience. But the only thing i have to say is go with your instincts..being a mother is an amazing transition in to a beautiful world. do whats right for you and your child, take advice but, take what you want and leave the rest. implement it in to your own system and its smooth sailing. sure there are rough waters ahead, but thats the beauty of it, learn and grow with your child- its a wonderful experience. each and every child is different- and you go with different approaches every time. find the feel, and go with it! good luck and happy parenting~!"
Erin in Oregon



"It is well worth the money to buy XS or newborn diapers for those first couple of months, especially if you have a smaller baby. It makes all the difference to have diaper that actually fits! I truly believe that is why we stuck with cloth diapering. Becuase we had diapers that worked and fit well from the very begining. They only lasted a couple of months, but it was worth it!"
Emily in Tennesee



"Words of advice:

*Join a mommy group. Never underestimate the power of a group of women in the same position as you to give you much needed support and advice, not to mention much needed adult conversations and last but not least: friendship.

*When a friend offers to come over and help you out, don't let pride stop you from accepting! Its amazing how much you can get done with an extra set of arms and eyes around.

* Don't always put yourself and your needs last. Its amazing how a shower, a hot meal, and 5 minutes of bathroom time alone really make the day less stressful.

*Get yourself a subscription to a magazine thats NOT child/parenting related. Hide it in the bathroom or under your mattress where the kids won't find it and rip it up.

*Take the time to try and learn a new hobby. Chances are theres other new moms out there wanting to learn too. Get together and knit, scrapbook, cook, garden, or whatever strikes your fancy. You'll make new friends, the kids can play together and you learn something new.

* Never let what an "expert" says in a book/magazine/TV override your motherly instinct. Remember, humans survived for thousands of years before TV and books, your intuition is more precious to your child's wellbeing then the latest parenting trends.

*Invest in good chocolate, keep a stash for bad days, or heck, eat some everyday and let it be your daily guilty pleasure.

*Never buy if you can borrow or buy from a friend. Big baby swings,bassinets, travel systems, bouncers and baby seats are quickly outgrown and stashed in the garage by most people. Ask around and see of a friend will let you borrow it for the 3 months your child is small enough to fit. Save the money for something important, like more chocolate and a mom savy haircut.

* Put $10 a month away as a ME ME ME fund. Use it for little splurges on yourself that you don't have to share: some coffe, new lip gloss, a manicure or a yummy baked good from a local bakery."
Cynthia in California



"1) When your children are grown and look back on their childhood, they will not remember the sink filled with dishes or the dust on the bookshelves. What they will remember are the times they sat on mom's lap to read a book or the walks to the park or the silly songs and stories you made up together. So forget about the housework and enjoy your children, soon they will be too big to sit on your lap.

2) There is not spoiling a baby... hold them for as long as you can

3) When you are in the middle of one of those 3 hr nursing sessions one evening thinking you are not getting anything done, remember that you are growing and nurturing a human being. Now that is a superpower, milk-making mama!

4) If they don't stink and are not wet, stop changing diapers in the night...they go back to sleep faster and so will you.

5) Gather as much information as you can, but in the end there is always another expert to contradict the last expert, so trust yourself as a mother and do what works best for you and your baby."
Christy in Colorado



"Think outside the box! : ) Just because the parenting books say it's one way or the mom's on your chat group/play group/church group/your mom/your grandma...whoever!!! Says that things are to be a certain way. Maybe that doesn't work with you or with your child. It's okay to be different. In fact it's "GREAT!!!" to be different.

Learn to Play in the rain! : )

Learn to let go! : ) Be easy-going. If the house gets out of order or the kids get out of order just ease up a little bit and be accepting that things happen sometimes. Nobody's perfect and that includes you and your kids!! : )"
Kim in California



"The thing I am sure to tell all my friends who are planning on nursing:

Get over it now... there are some days when you are going to be nursing on the toilet.

Which goes along with: Don't be shocked at 2 weeks, 6 weeks, etc. when your baby wants to nurse all day. It's just a growth spurt... planning on spending a couple of days doing nothing but nursing.

And of course: Do what feels right. If you want to hold your baby all day and all night, do it. He/she won't be a baby forever, so don't be afraid to baby him/her now. I have never heard of a college student still being nursed or having to be rocked to sleep, etc."
Brandi in Texas



"Use cloth diapers! You'll never regret it! It's better for baby, better for your checkbook, and better for the environment. Plus, it's easier than you think!"
Heather



"New Mom Advice...

1. Don't worry about the little stuff(like dirty houses) enjoy every minute of your new baby, it goes fast.

2. Sleep when your baby sleeps.

3. When people offer to help you out, take it!

4. You will learn as you go.You will be a baby expert before you know it.

5. Take as many pictures as you can, babies change everyday."
Becca